I’ll BUY you a crackpipe…just don’t break my spark plugs please.

You know the recession has hit when the crack smokers of San Francisco are unable to purchased low cost pipes and must resort to the vandalism of my motorcycle. The scenario goes like this: coming back to the bike after a night out at the club or some other function and trying to start up. It is a little slow to turn over and seems to be running funny when it does fire up. First course of action in this diagnosis is to look down and find a plug wire dangling unattached. Further investigation reveals the porcelain broken off of the spark plug, still threaded in with the exposed copper wire protruding at a bizarre angle. Break off the porcelain part anyway, and you have a little jagged edge tube that you can smoke crack with and cut your lips while you blister them.
The engine design of the 86’ Yamaha Radian leaves the spark plugs in a vulnerable position to predatory rock smokers. Many bikes have the plugs set in a deeper, small space to where you need a deep socket to install and remove them. If they aren't just covered by the fairings all together. This makes a crack pipe/plug jacking a more work intensive affair and adds no small measure of difficulty to the procedure.
The first time it happened, I wanted to strangle the perp. I started to carry extras after the third time that some fool knocked me down from 4 cylinders to 3. It has became a recurrence that I have managed to get somewhat used to, strangely enough. Due in part to the realization that getting angry didn’t seem to help the situation. All the same though, if you need to something to blaze your white pebble with, hit me up here on the blog and I will BUY you a crackpipe. I’ve seen them for sale in a store downtown for .99 cents, and that is half the cost of a replacement spark plug. Take this offer into consideration before you baptize my bike in the aftermath of your singular need.